pinterest...

I will be the first to admit...I know very little about Pinterest except that it is like a personal virtual bulletin board.  I can wander around looking at other's ideas and "pin" the ones I covet onto my "bulletin board".  Please, all of you in" the know" correct me if I am wrong {and I likely am...}

Having the function of this virtual genius idea understood, I have one question.  Why, or why would anyone want to "follow" what I am "pinning"?  Perhaps this is a compliment that others want to know what I have tacked up on my board...a hodgepodge of  crafts-recipes-hairdos-outfits & home decor.  Honestly, this is highly embarrassing!  I struggle finding my own virtual bulletin board...yep, I am uncertain of where I have left all of those virtual riches I want to embrace as my own in hopes of making my life more beautiful.  All I have really done is created a virtual mess...and it's a public mess!  Oh me...it's like having all my treasures thrown in my garage and leaving the door raised 24-7 for all to see how unorganized my life is!

To anyone who is "following" me...I am truly apologetic. I am not worthy of  following.  In fact, you could probably find what your looking for quicker all on your own...if not it may be wedged between the Christmas decorations and unicycle just past the dusty weight bench in the far left corner of my garage. And the door is open most weekends and weekday afternoons so come on take a gander whenever you'd like.

Just bein' honest!

one word

so i made my list of resolutions...the dirty dozen as I am referring to them.

{and I am sticking with them...}

but Amber also challenged me to choose one word for the year.

i can never say just one word, unless of course it is the "last word"

then i covet it much like an Olympian standing on the podium proudly adorning a gold medal

but i have tossed and turned this restless idea over and over in my mind these past several days

wondering if I could chose one word

{Pat, could I buy a few extra letters?}

MERCIES

{something that gives evidence of divine favor}

gentleness-goodwill-grace-humanity-kindliness-lienency-softheartedness-tenderness

God daily offers me divine favor.

I am a follower of God.

I must embrace the mercies He showers upon me.

I am created in His likeness.

I must pass on His tender grace & goodwill.

Dear Lord,

 Thank you for your undeserving grace. 

Let the adversity we face as a family be your mercies not yet recognized. 

Let my word {mercies}be the force behind my softhearted actions.

Amen.

the dirty dozen...

I am thankful for the fresh, much needed start of a new year.

Here are the twelve, I will embrace this year of 2012,

1.  Blog-write more {I mentioned this on Jan. 4th's post}

2.  Call it like I see it {this may have come up in the previous post as well}...I learned {and desperately desire to unlearn} to give my mom the answers she wanted to hear.  With my mom being gone two years now, I want to put aside my perceived pleasing answers and gracefully say what I want or how I see a situation.

3.  Meatless Monday...January's Runner's magazine has a brief article on small nutrition changes you can make which will improve one's diet and workout performance.  Meatless Monday was one of the suggestions-simply don't consume meat one day a week.

4.  Qualify for the 2013 Boston Marathon.  I qualified ten years ago for Boston, but had a small interruption in my training {Jeremiah's adoption} which prevented me from running the much acclaimed Boston Marathon.  I am running the Rock-n-Roll Marathon this June and need to finish in 3 hours 55 minutes...which is actually 15 minutes longer than I had ten years ago...sweet advantage of having another decade under my feet!

5.  Test a new recipe each week.  This week I made Ahi Poke and it was a hit. Next is going to be a roasted brussels sprouts recipe.  I will post these {even the flops-there has to be some, right?} each week.

6.  Date Peter more...this past two years have been so full of medicine, doctors appointments, and sheer panic on my part that I have forgotten to have fun with my husband.  I vow to laugh more with him.

7.  Make kefir...why?  It is a form of cultured milk {like yogurt}, but has a plethora of those good germs that your tummy and immune system need.  We all could use more culture in our lives...especially my husband who is hooked on antibiotics for the time being.

8.  Read the Bible more...I am a good devotional-praying-journaling girl but so often I don't read entire books of the Bible.  I am kind of like a baby penguin.  I let so many amazing Christian authors chew and digest the Bible and then spit it into my brain.  It is time this birdie learns to chew the Word herself.

9.  Yoga...this is a "bucket" item{Scooter says this make me sound old.  "Hey, Scoot...I don't care if I sound old"-this takes us to #2-graceful enough, right?}.  I just want to try in once.  I don't think I will become a bikram or shanti follower.

10.  Finish Amber's scrapbook.  She is married...it is time.

11.  Take my car to the car wash more often.  In spite of it's age, my dependable Suburban feels "new off the car lot" when it is cleaned...inside & out.

12.  Apply to compete on the Amazing Race with Amber.  We would have too much fun and be so hillarious to watch...promise!  We need a techy person that can make an AMAZING video for us to submit with our applications.

That's my twelve for twelve.

What do you resolve this year?

a failed attempt...wahwahwah.

So I decided with the new year, comes resolutions...

And one of those resolutions is to dust off the laptop-stop googling lymes disease and write more because i LOVE to write...even if i am my only fan!

So day four of the new year, which is really only day two, because we were forced to go to Hawaii for a week to celebrate 25 years of being married to the man of my dreams {and nightmares some days-resolution #2...call it like i see it}.

So snug in my flannel pjs and plush pink {not VS PINK...please} robe ready to let the creative juices flow from my fingertips...when my ears are confined on just one thing.."smackage".

yep-I am sure Roget's has incorporated this word but if you are not familiar let me paint a picture for you...

brown eyed boy {who is so precious...in a still photo} did not eat all of his dinner and has the audacity to ask for a Oreo shake {my speciality after interning at Baskin-Robbins during high school} to which i gave him the "stare" and said nope, then stupidly {i have had a glass of chardonnay...not a bottle, so I am unsure of where the "parental wisdom" fell thru the cracks...but it did right smack dab in the middle of my family room} and said you can help yourself to and whatever you can make-he is not versed in blender operation quite yet.

please note...the gallon size jar that those large discount warehouses sell which is "easy grip jar"...i might have sensitive hearing {my tympanic membrane has reached a fever pitch} as he smacks on pickles which is a vegetable but i have zero endearment to at the moment.  To accompany the sound was the stench {i mean a nasal hullabaloo} of pungent vinegar. 

operation BLOG...failed.

but there is 362 {it is a leap year} days to recover from this minor roadblock.

did i mention my sweet man of a quarter of a century was accompany the brown eye boy by chopping on Hawaiian macadamia nuts?

happy new year!

cliff jumping...

"mom, why are you so brave?"...sweet brown eyes ask at the end of an adventuresome day last month.  he was referring to us cliff jumping in mexico.  i was not wearing a nike swoosh on my bikini, but i  did it anyway.  in fact, there was no hesitation...i walked to the end of the platform and dove, head first into the "cenote".  i am learning bravery isn't about calming the doubting voice screaming for my attention.  it is about taking action in spite of the voice. 

i am not sure when the "doubting voice" showed up as it has been around for most of my life.  my best guess is i traded the "voice" for my dad who simply walked out of my young little life.  i was so innocent-young-naive, i did not know i could tell the voice it was not allowed to take permanent residence in my eyes-ears-head-heart.  it has grown into a more argumentative lecturer, casting shadows on every facet of my life.  i would try screaming louder or formulating a stronger argument, but the voice always seemed to swindle away my confidence.

i am learning to dive in spite of the doubts...God's grace and goodness are my safety net.  that brown eyed boy stood at the top of the cliff, doubting he could jump into the water-questioning his bravery,  i was there in the water coaxing him to join me.  instead of listening to the "voice" and retreating back to peter, he chose to leap from the ledge and land into the cool refreshing waters. 

i am brave because i want to teach my brown eyed boy that the begrudging voice is loud but God's quiet confidence it trustworthy...but we must leap to Him.

what will be your act of bravery even with doubt cajoling for your attention?

happy un-anniversary...

it is the little things that are worth celebrating.

july 14th, 2009...the worst day ever.

last thursday we celebrated happy un-alzheimer's anniversary!

two lime colored candles marking our progress.

isn't he just so charming...just love that man!

find something to celebrate today...and do it with cake!

lessons learned...

a mark on a freshly painted wall, a ding in the new car door, red juice splashed on cleaned carpet.  after a few days, weeks, months you get used to the blemish, but it remains there.  reminding you life is unpredictable, mistakes or even tragedy happens.  a few years ago july somewhere between just after midnight on the 13th and before sun up on the 15th, there was a nick, score, notch dug so deep into the 14th that would change our family...today marks two years-

and while the path has been challenging, here is what i've learned:

1.  true friends are the ones that call, walk, email, text & cry with me.  i have learned friend is a verb, not a noun...it is full of action, not just hollow words.     

2.  apologizing is hard but also necessary.  i have misspoken many times in life but there seems to be a magnifying glass that illuminates these times more now than ever before.  i have learned to say i am sorry-wrong-could you please forgive my words-behavior...again.

3.  painting a wall is not difficult...especially when you ask another female customer in the paint department of home depot for some assistance and advice.  i wish i could find her again and tell her she was right.  it was easier than i had imagined & i am glad to say i did it!

4.  my children believe and trust in God.  we have taught them-exampled for them...but it isn't until their sweet souls were held to the fire that we truly saw their deep faith in our Creator.  i am grateful to be walking with them during this time and seeing God in and thru their lives.  jeremiah has become a prayer warrior for his daddy each night praying for healing and renewed health.  amber & scoot have set aside plans and dreams to help me and popsicle.  they pray and encourage me to press on toward the goal.

5.  i can negotiate a bank loan and talk with businessmen...even when my palms are sweaty and heart is racing.  my bravery is best transferred thru email than in person. 

6.  asking for help is much easier than trying to juggle it all inside of my heart and head.  those friends {in #1} love to lend a hand, as do my precious children...and that sweet home depot customer!

7.  life moves on even when circumstances are challenging...charlie & maya were born, amber is engaged & a wedding is just around the bend, scoot finished his first year of college, jeremiah has school & sports.

8.  nurses work endlessly & carry so much of a doctor's load.  i admire all the work and care they give countless patients.

9.  somedays just lend themselves to a good cry...but then it is important to blow my nose, wipe the tears & move forward...and call ams-scoot-gwynno!

10.  i love teaching...being back in the classroom a few days a week this past year has been distracting & warms my soul...shaping those precious lives-even just for a day.

11.  i understand the value of a dollar...and so do my children.  we took God's provisions for granted.  i feel shallow admitting this but also realize it takes the "covetness" out of the dollar.  who knew i would love target clothes just as much as nordstrom!

12.  we are a family-a force to be reckoned with-a melange of callow superheros {i am working on names for each of us}.  we are stronger than i had imagined but it is only together and with God that we stand firm.

13. humor and absurdity...perhaps even borderline inappropriate behavior keep us all laughing and that is the perfect medicine!  {example:  i asked a man at the july 4th parade if i could pet his wiener {dog} after amber dared me...i did-he said yes!}  inappropriate?  yes.  hilarious?  oh, yeah.

14.  peter is an amazing man that has a cast iron tummy to withstand all of the antibiotics he ingests orally and intravenously.  he faces daily challenges with grace, humility and integrity.  i love him more today...and look forward to the glorious plan God has for him...and us!

15.  believing in God and marriage are effortless when life is easy, but when faced with challenge so much is stripped away.  it is in those naked moments you realize how much you truly love God & your partner.  saying in sickness and health on my wedding day was simple...living in sickness instead of health is much more challenging.

16.  lymes disease is a tricky pickle we find ourselves in but...we are going to beat it!  {please close your eyes and picture michael jackson with a lime green glove and a crotch grab-pelvis thrust...singing "just beat it, beat it, beat it"}

hugs & joy