Thursday, January 16, 2014

a cup named grace...

it all started with a little too much noise & a misunderstanding.  a boisterous starbucks & a barista asking my name.  i said chris.  she heard grace.  and it feels so very right.  who doesn't need a cup named grace?

in this season of pjm+sick, i have been overwhelmed not by just the HUGE decisions like where to safely place him but also the littles including reordering checks with or without his name {i know, many of you are saying "debit card"...hello 21 century-but the delivery pharmacy for pjm & my bug guy-they need checks still}.  so a cup, or even a few drops, of grace randomly sprinkled about my day remind me that God is here in the middle of this mess.  and that He loves me and my precious family and my broken husband.

hebrews 4:16 says that we can approach our God of grace with confidence knowing we will find beauty and mercy in our times of need.  and yes, i know at the end of me {and pjm} there will be this beautiful presence of being with Him...but today-yesterday-8.3 months ago, i lose all focus of Him.  the complications of wearing many hats exhausts me...tending to sweet browns & that new common core math while balancing visits with pjm and attempting to keep a pulse on our businesses, are nothing less than taxing.  i do not deny having help from family & a very competent CPA but in the dark of night and some days even in the bright of the noonday sun, it is overwhelming & intimidating.

and that's where a cup named grace can be found...somewhere between the hope of yesterday and the mercies of tomorrow, He is ever-present in my today of messy.

dear God.
i want to say i am so unsure of how i made it a year,
but then when i search the very depths of my soul, i find Your grace.
thank you for a year of tender mercies when life was beyond crazy.
thank you for children that kept their focus & loved our family more than themselves.
thank you for friends that held space to allow me to grieve his presence, yet the loss of pjm.
for girlfriend dates-surprise parties-vacations in mexico to embrace family.
and for that barista & a misunderstanding.
but most of all, for a cup named grace that is new every morning.
grace aka chris

No comments:

Post a Comment