some days i stumble.

i was running with amber one morning last week.

i stumbled...and did this.
this was the sum of the damage except
for the small blemish it left on my ego.
my knees were sore.
my skin was sensitive.

the next morning lady antebellum sang me awake.
beckoning me to hit {well not literally} the pavement again.
i would have preferred to stay warm & scrap free in bed
but you see, i am afraid if i stop running,
i may never run again and that is what clears my mind-
gives me time to focus on God-
allows my pores to sweat & my heart to race-
fills my lungs with the crisp fall air.
it maintains me both physically & mentally.
i cover my knees with running tights-lace up my shoes,
beating the asphalt another morning in spite of a wound.

i realize those battered knees are a metaphor for our season.

yes, i would prefer to remain in the safe cocoon of flannel sheets & pjs.
closing my eyes so that red shirt he wore yesterday is hidden from my sight.
muting my ears to the words that messily stumble from his lips.
confining my thoughts to those of joy, away from the uncertainty of what if & when this.

yes, my knees are a sore reflection of my heart & soul.
scrapped-bruised-pained.
but remaining in bed to nurse the sorrow of the season is inconceivable-impractical-impossible.
sweet brown eyes greets me each sunrise, with a raspy "good morning mom" .
those eyes-that scratchy voice reminds me God's plan & timing are flawless.

because of His grace-strength-love,
i emerge from the safe envelope of bedding
& trust Him to guide me thru the hurdles & hurts of the day.