and with a tight grip on mr. lincoln, he raced off like he was scoring the tie breaking goal. i returned to watching the game and a few moments later his raspy voice interrupts, "mom, can you hold these for me" and his long, slender fingers are clam-shelling at least 1,251 empty, sugary calories worth of candy! like a pinata had cracked in two and he was the sole recipient of all the goods inside. of course there was NO change-he managed to spend every last cent, so i gave him "that look" while stuffing all but one empty calorie morsel in my handbag leaving him a lone cherry ring pop.
first thought: that assuming bugger-how dare he spend the entire $5 on candy. how does he feel so entitled? second thought: you wanted him to grow and learn to "handle" the world, but have you prepared him for that...perhaps there are still areas for growth.
late at night i lay in bed wallowing in thoughts of my life & dementia & raising sweet brown eyes alone...without his daddy. i return to the $5 bill incident & feel God's tug at not just my heart but my head.
dear chrissy-
I want you to be a confident, competent woman in this world.
I have taught you {through your years with pjm} the lessons & unlike being a mom,
I have promised to always go with you-even to the snack bar.
how many times have you assumed ownership of blessings without giving Me a second thought?
in your heart & head you believe you are entitled without ever muttering a prayer of thanks.
perhaps there are still areas for us to chisel away at you to make more room for Me.
love.
God
