the waiting game...

when i was five, i wanted to be six and a half and have long legs like my sister.
when i was ten, i wanted to be 12 and sport a training bra and shave my blond haired legs.
when i was 14, i wanted to be 16 so i could date boys.
when i was 18, i wanted to be 21 so i could drink...legally.
when i was 24, i wanted to be pregnant.
when i was 30, i wanted to be done with car seats.
when i was 38, i wanted another baby.
when i was 41, i wanted that baby to be ready for preschool.
when i was 45, i wanted a different answer...because the one we received dripped with ugliness.
when i was in church last sunday, i decided to stop wanting and find joy today.

i realized i have been "fellowshipping" with my challenges and not with God.  my thoughts stir up emotions causing turmoil inside my weary soul...God knows my prayers...God knows my circumstances...God knows what i am wanting.  i am finding joy in the waiting...taking my mind off of the circumstances while God solves it.

what are you wanting...find joy in today instead.